Set Me Up For Success, Mom.
This has become a common phrase in our house. The kids will come to us and say, “Can you set me up for success?”
We are building a foundation of trust in our family with this phrase.
Our kids know that we will be doing what is best for them when we use this phrase. We use it with ourselves as well to remind ourselves that we need to make sure we aren’t setting ourselves up to fail. The feeling of failure is debilitating. It makes life so much harder, and sometimes those failures are entirely preventable.
In my year of learning to Belong in my skin, one of the first things I realized is that I need to learn to trust myself.
To begin the process of learning to trust myself, I said no to something every day for one month.
Just Say No
Saying no to something each day meant that I gave myself freedom from myself. Every single day I was putting too many items on my to do list for the day. Putting myself in the habit of looking for something to cut out gave me the ability to prioritize and most importantly to breathe during the day. This simple task helped me find the parts to my day that were not working out and to adjust. After a month of saying no I felt that my load was lighter, and I also now have the permission to say no to myself whenever I need to.
Stick To My Decisions
I spend time planning each week, but often I second guess my plans, or try to rearrange them continuously. So much time goes into the planning, that sometimes nothing actually gets accomplished. Even simple tasks like getting dressed for the day, what to make Davy for his lunch, and whether or not I was going to boil water for coffee became mind consuming. I recognized the need to change this, so I added Stick to My Decisions to the habit tracker taped to the top of my desk. Each day I made it through the day without getting paralyzed by a small decision I could check off a day. It took me longer than 21 days to make it through, but now I have set up little routines for myself.
The best thing I solved was getting dressed. I recognized that the reason it was so hard was that at 5am in the morning when I wake up I cannot really think through the plan for the day well enough to know what kind of clothes I need for the day. Now I set my clothes out every evening because in the evening I have enough mental power to think about the kind of day I will be having the following day.
This little routine makes it so much easier to get out of bed instead of hitting snooze every morning.
Can you identify a habitual failure in your own life? How could you take some time right now to set yourself up for success? Please share in the comments some of the ways that you are setting yourself up for success.